Saturday, May 9, 2015

Of School and Vacations

Bali bound in t-minus seven days. 

One little week stands between me and Indonesia. I don't think it's quite hit me. I don't think it even will until I'm boarding the plane in LAX. It's hard to believe that four months have passed since we booked our plane tickets. Normally, anything exciting drags out the time. Four months seems like eight and time just feels snail-slow. But for some reason, this semester has flown by. Probably because it's been the easiest semester I've ever had. The material has been difficult for many classes, but the lack of projects and homework gave me a lot of time to relax. Minimal effort needed to pass classes, which is so very different from the last couple semesters in which I spent a lot of time curled into a ball sobbing about how I was wasting time curled into a ball sobbing.

Four semesters down, three to go. It bothers me at times that I'm taking so long to finish school. This semester will mark the 9th year that I've been in school and all I have to show for it is an AA degree. But I have to remember to cut myself slack. For six of those years, I had that crippling depression. My motivation was gone. I'm surprised I had enough to keep signing up for classes. I remember signing up for my first ever proper biology class (excluding the Agricultural Bio class I took in high school which was, let's be real, not a biology class. We spent days walking around looking at flowers and cattle). It was an intro to biology course taught by a professor at the junior college called Mr. Dowis. I don't know if it was the material he was teaching or because he was just an amazing teacher, but he rekindled this love of science that I'd lost somewhere down the line. It was a turning point in my life. Suddenly I had this strong motivation, and it was exciting and strange. I was lost in the dark for so long, I'd forgotten what it was like to feel passionate about something. I will never forget that moment. That seemingly insignificant college class literally changed my life. My whole point of view was different after that. It was the start of my ascend out of depression and to this confident, hopeful person I am today. Mr. Dowis has no idea that he'd changed my life. Someday, I'll tell him.

My semester officially ends on Thursday night after my Animal Behavior final. From there, it's go go go before the trip. Clean the house, do the laundry, feed the animals, pack our bags--so much to do in so little time. Somewhere in the there, my coworkers want me to come out to drinks to celebrate mine and another coworkers joint birthday. Seeing as I have a cumulative organic chemistry final on my birthday and a cumulative calculus final the next day, it's the only birthday party I can really get with friends. That's okay though; Garrett and I will just celebrate my 27th belatedly in a whole other country. 

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